HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

FOR S**** & GIGGLES :)

Mr. J.O You Did it Again

Today folks, these words of wisdom come from Joel Osteen once again...and his wife Victoria

 

The other day they both spoke about worry and "staying in the game". When things don't go the way you wanted or had planned and you begin to worry and fear kicks in...that worry that you acquired brings you down.Victoria said that worry is a thief and steals the passion within you. Yes, there will be those downs in your life but worry does nothing for your body, mind, or soul.

Joel then began to speak about when your life doesn't go acording to plan and you are hurt by past relationships, lost your job, friend did you wrong, anything that have hurt you, you become injured. But guess what? You need to stay in the game, you need to keep playing while you are injured. You cant let your pain cause you to lose your passion. Anybody can sit on the sidelines, but it takes a strong and faithful person to stay in the game.

Also, in order to get your mind off the pain, you need to help others who are in pain as well. By helping others, your mindset's direction changes and you no longer pity yourself but begin to think  about someone else who is in need and while you're doing so God is paying attention and using that act of kindness through your own pain as something to be awarded for in the future. As Joel would say, "HE will turn your scars into stars."

So, next time when things aren't going your way, remember worrying only brings you down. You have to get past that hurt and pain and you do this by focusing on someone else, someone else who is in need in order to get your mind off your own pain. It encourages your mind to move on and continue with your life. 

And always remember never stop when you get injured, stay in the game and play through the pain.

Stay *(I)nspired, Misha J

Use Your Voice

For today's Motivational Monday, I want you to think about your passions and your beliefs. 

 You have the ability to think and to speak

 so why not use your voice to spread the word for the good?

        I love to look to music artists to motivate me, but often times, especially in these days, not very many of them sing meaningful lyrics and rap is waaaaaaayyyyyyy off the mark nowadays. Now I like rap I do, but rappers these days.....no words...its pretty obvious what they rap about. It just has no substance and sends negative messages to our youth.

 But I have just recently discovered a rap artist that I was instantly moved by his words and his style I don't know why I am just now hearing about him but this video by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis called Same Love spoke to me even though the lyrics weren't specifically directed towards me. But I felt what he was speaking and for the people he was speaking for.

Then I found one of his older songs/videos called Wings which also spoke about issues in our country which were so meaningful...

So after you view these videos....Think about what moves you...what motivates you...and what you can do as a person as a human being to create change for the better with your voice...ENJOY!

Stay *(I)nspired, Misha J

In Need of Solace

After working all day in the public, I need some comfort, a good dose of Sunday Solace! While at work today, the serenity prayer kept ringing in my head. Maybe it was to keep me calm and positive throughout my day. I kept hearing  it:

God grant me the serenity 

to accept the things I cannot change; 

courage to change the things I can;

and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time; 

Enjoying one moment at a time; 

Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; 

Taking, as He did, this sinful world

as it is, not as I would have it; 

Trusting that He will make all things right

if I surrender to His Will;

That I may be reasonably happy in this life 

and supremely happy with Him

Forever in the next.

Amen.

Prayer makes a difference and I find solace in it. Here's a poem entitled, "The Difference Prayer Makes."

       I got up early one morning and rushed right into  the day, I had so much to accomplish that I didn't take time to pray. 
       Problems just tumbled about me, and heavier came each task; "why doesn't God help me?" I wondered. He answered: "You didn't ask."
       I wanted to see joy and beauty----but the day toiled on, gray and bleak; I wondered why God didn't show me, he said, "but you didn't seek."
       I tried to come into God's presence, I used all my keys at the lock; God gently and lovingly chided: "my child you didn't knock."
       I woke up early this morning and paused before entering the day; I had so much to accomplish that I had to take time to pray.



When you are alone in your day pray. When you are having a hard time pray. It helps. Take time to journal tonight on this topic: Is your emotional life fairly even or full of peaks and valleys? What about your spiritual life? If you're emotional and spiritual life are inconsistent add prayer to your life.







Tonight on OWN Network Joel Osteen sits down with Oprah for Lifeclass! Here is a sneak peak:

Don't miss it tonight at  9pm! Hope you find solace in this post, I did! 

Motivating from a far~Ari

The Smell of Celebrity (Fashion Fwd Friday)

Alright, I know that this falls more into beauty but I'm going to talk about it anyway. This has been a burning thought of mine for quite some time.....Do celebrities smell like their colognes and perfumes? And do they even wear their own fragrances? I mean every celebrity has a perfume line; take a look at the list below:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080831121028AAObmSE

I mean, did you see that list. Everyone from Beyonce', Brittany Spears, Celine Dion, Katy Perry, Diddy, Usher, Carlos Santan, to David Beckham and Ms. Piggy herself has a line.....

Y'all not hearing me huh?

It gets worse when G-list celebrities like Jim Jones' mother decides that she wants to join the likes of Giorgio Armani and Elizabeth Taylor in being a perfumer. Take a look at this clip :

You may have to fwd...

Hey, I'm trying to smell presidential when is Lady O coming out with her line? Talking about smelling good, lol. 

One Wing-Part 3

        

“What about Roselyn?” I said in the most uninterested tone of voice.

“She….well….Roselyn… she’s ...uhhh,” Myles says as he stumbles over his words.

Myles is the most intelligent and articulate kid I know and he has never spoken like this. Ever!

“What Myles? WHAT?!”

            “ROCELYN WENT BLIND!” he blurted out.

            “Blind? Myles what are you talking about?”

            “Sis, she’s blind. She’s blind. She’s blind. She’s blind,” he continued to repeat as I heard his tears begin to run.

            “Myles, Myles, Myles, honey calm down. What happened?”

            “I don’t know. I don’t know. Something about, laser eye surgery, a fake doctor, an accident, I don’t know but she’s blind Rae. Richard called your dad earlier today and tried to explain what happened, but he was so hurt, upset, and angry that your parents still didn’t get the full story, so they flew out to New York immediately.”

            Richard was Rocelyn’s husband of four years and he damn near does anything for her. Of course he does anything for her; he’s living in my sister’s perfect life. Why wouldn’t he be a great guy? Although he’s my brother-in-law and has been in our family for quite some time I don’t really know much about him other than he is “such an amazing man.”

 When Rocelyn moved to New York, I never visited her and she never came back home to visit us. That never bothered me none because we are two very different people, different interests, different perspectives, just different everything. We haven’t “clicked” since we were kids and I have always been okay with that, but hearing this from Myles has me feeling some type of way. I don’t know what to say or do at this point.

“Myles, I gotta go okay,” I quickly said.

“But Rae, are you com-”

Man this kills me to be so short with him, but hell what am I supposed to do or say?

“Myles, I said I gotta go.”

            CLICK. I threw my phone back into my bag and just stood there feeling so stale in the inside.

            The woman who attempted to talk to me before she was interrupted by my phone call approached me again. She looked young, maybe a little older than me, very slim, flawless face, big beautiful smile with one dimple on her left cheek with a long brown bob. Just by looking at her, it seemed as though she didn’t belong here. Why? Because she looked too beautiful, too chic, too sophisticated to be in this part of town.

            “Is everything alright, sweetheart?” she said with the most concerned face.

            “Uhhh. Yea everything is fine,” I replied although I knew that she knew that I was lying.

            “What brings you in tonight?”

            “Well, I heard that-” I fumbled as I tried to quickly think of a reasonable story.

“Wait, don’t tell me, you heard about our new dance studio and wanted to check it out?”

That caught me off guard, why would she assume that I came here for dance? I don’t know this woman, and I’m sure this woman doesn’t know me.

“Uhhm…Do I know you?”

She giggled and replied, “No I don’t believe so, but I’m Jillian by the way.”

“Hi, I’m Rae. So why did you think I came here for dance?”

“Well, I noticed how you were standing. Dancers usually stand so gracefully even when they aren’t dancing and I also noticed how you were leaning on one leg and pointing your other foot. Sorry, I’m not a creeper or anything. Dancers tend to recognize other dancers by their body language. So am I right or wrong?”        

“Both, I am a dancer, but I came here for the spaghetti night and I didn’t even know this place had a dance studio.”

“Well, Ms. Rae go ahead and get you something to eat. My mother cooks all the food here and her food is amazing. Everyone loves her cooking.”

“Okay, cool,” I said as a smile arose on my face feeling more comfortable here.

“Yea, the cafeteria is right down the hall and it’s the last door on the right and if you’re not too full after then come down to the dance studio and check it out.”

“Okay, thanks Jillian maybe I will.”

Jillian walked away and headed towards a group of excited young girls and one shy looking guy who all were dressed in dance warm up clothes. I just stood there and watched them as Jillian seemed to pump them up for their first dance lesson. For a second there was an urge in me to start dancing right then and there, but my stomach started yelling at me, plus that would have been just plain awkward to start doing pirouettes down the hall, so I started walking to the cafeteria to see what all the talk was about this spaghetti.

When I entered, the cafeteria was packed with young boys and girls. The chatter and laughter grew and grew as I panned the room. In the far left corner was an older yet pretty woman serving spaghetti. That must be Jillian’s mom. I walked over there and stood in line, it went pretty quick because there was a large amount of spaghetti on my plate in no time.

 After I grabbed a cup of lemonade from the table I looked around for a place to sit. A group of kids were getting up from a table in the back, so I sat there. Before I could even twirl my noodles around my fork and stuff my face, I felt my bag vibrating again. I reached inside and pulled out my phone and there was a text message from Myles.

It read: Rae, I don’t why you think whatever you’re doing is more important than your sister and your family. Everyone is wondering where you are and what you are doing, especially after I told you what happened to Rocelyn. This is serious and you acting as if you don’t care and I don’t know why you’re acting like that. Well, whatever, do what you want to do, but your parents are flying me out to New York tomorrow and said they would fly you out too but they don’t know where you are. Come home Rae, we need to be with Rocelyn right now.

           

          Before I threw my phone back into my bag, I powered it off and then proceeded to eat the entire plate of spaghetti. Man this is sooooo good. Either I am just that hungry or Jillian wasn’t lying about her mother’s cooking. I wiped my face clean, emptied my tray and left the cafeteria.

          The music that resonated throughout the hallway lead me to the dance studio. I peeked through the window and saw Jillian teaching the group of girls the basics of ballet. The girls in the front reminded me of the first dance class I took with Rocelyn when we were little. Flashbacks streamed through my head, and I just broke down.

Are you settling?

 Truth is...I know its not Thursday, but I'm still trying to catch up lol But on a serious note...

Truth is a lot of us are settling. But where is the boundary between doing what we have to do to get where we want to be and being patient for getting exactly what we want?

I'm bringing attention to this because sometimes I am confused. I do know that things don't happen over night, that there is a ladder to climb, that it is a journey. But where do you draw the line between settling and being patient?

Lately, I've been seeing two different perspectives. Some say, "Oh, I refuse to do this or do that. That's not me. That's not what I want to do with my life. That is an insult." Yet, they are in a not-so-good place in their life and that opportunity will help them out in the time being.

Then others say, "You know what I am just going to go ahead and do this. It may not be exactly what I am looking for, but its something." Then again, with perspectives like this people end up sticking with it for a very long time, sometimes for the rest of their lives.

So do you settle? Or do you acquire an extreme force of patience? Which one is reasonable? They both have their pros and cons. I am particularly talking about career choices in this economy but this can also apply to other aspects of life such as relationships to a certain extent.

What are your views on it?

Stay *(I)nspired, Misha J

The Voice (Talent Tuesday)

Soooo... yes I know I'm behind in my posts, but its cool though I'm going to catch up lol
Also, thanks ari for the birthday shoutout, I appreciate the love

This post is for Tuesday, cuz you know I was getting it in for my birthday lol jk but anywho I know this was a few weeks back but every time I watch The Voice (idk if you are voice fans, but I am) and what keeps coming to mind is the battle between Trevin Hunte & Amanda Brown. That battle to me was sooo intense, like you felt the emotion. Now Trevin, when I first heard his voice in the blind auditions I was amazed. To me, his voice has so much emotion and you just feel what he sings. I nearly cried when he sang Listen in the blind auditions. He caught my attention and he is my favorite on the show....But I also like De' borah and she's from Chicago. Woot Woot!!! Chi Town!!! lol

                           Here are the clips...let me know if I am right or just out of my mind....

Now, Amanda is good but she didn't catch my attention like Trevin did, and she kind of reminds me of keri hilson..btw whatever happened to her? lol...well anywho but when she sang Vision of Love with Trevin it was just an amazing duet...Voices went very well together...

                      Well Trevin, I am definitely cheering for you! I hope you win this thing :)


Well, sorry guys I'll post Truth is.... Tomorrow...and of course One Wing- Part 3 on Saturday...So watch out for that :)

Stay *(I)nspired, Misha J

A Dose of Wisdom

We're going to keep it simple and straight forward today......

"Turn your wounds into weapons." 

I heard someone tell this to a friend a few weeks ago and it caught my attention. The things that we are jaded by or hurt us the most we should use them not for our selfish benefit but for good. It's like changing a negative into a positive. So, I charge you to "turn your wounds into weapons". 

"Turn your wounds into weapons."

*Marinate on that! 

Random Post~Surprise!

Happy Birthday Misha!!! 

Hope each day of your life you are better than yesterday! Celebrate with class and live it up with style!

________________________________________________________________________________

I got you a gift that you'll enjoy! Here it is (the real one is in the mail):

That's right some mellow tunes to ease your mind courtesy of Anita Baker. 

Take a listen to her single 'Lately' re-tuned from the musical stylings of  Tyrese:

Her album "Only Foreve" is in stores today! Pick up a copy....

Again have a wonderful Birthday Misha!

(Wo)Man In The Mirror

It's Motivation Monday! Monday is not over yet so you still have time to make it meaningful. One of my favorite songs is 'Man in the Mirror' from the late grate Michael Jackson! I love Michael! You just don't understand. Please listen to the lyrics of this song and watch the video. I want you to think about who you are and the things that are going on in society today.

Okay! I know what you're thinking...that didn't motivate me it made me sad. So, what if it did. A majority of the issues depicted in Jackson's music video are still occurring today, around us. Look around you. What makes you mad, upset, frustrated, or sad? Be motivated by those things and be able to look yourself in the mirror and say, "I'm gonna make a change for once in my life."

What changes do you need to make to help the world become a better place, in MJ's words, "for you, for me and the entire human race"? Can't think of anything? I have a suggestion for you....VOTE! If you are of voting age, make the difference this election year through exercising your voter rights.


All this week be motivated by the changes that you want to see in yourself and others!


Motivating from a far~Ari

Show your Appreciation (Sunday Solace)

Often times the people in our lives do so much for us on the regular, and they do it so often and without hesitation that we may forget to acknowledge their kindness and take it for granted.

Although they may be family and really close friends and its out of love, they still deserve to be acknowledged and appreciated for all they do for us, right?

Today, think of those that do a lot for you and think about how you have shown your appreication for whatever they have done for you, still do for you, and will do for you in the future. If you havent done much to really show them how much you care, then today think of ways you can show your appreciation. A surprise gift like a gift card from their favorite store, or a handmade card, or a dinner out, anything that you know they will like is perfect. Remember for most people it is the little things that you do for them that touches their heart. I know for me it is.

Believe me, their face will light up and you will feel good after you have done so. Seeing others' happy faces will definitely brighten your day. It'll be good for the soul. :)

Stay (I)nspired, Misha J

One Wing-Part 2

            My dad has a way of getting under my skin. I mean, nothing I do he is proud of or believes in. Except for that time where I told my grandmother off for thinking that I was gay because of my eccentric attire. Her words not mine. See my dad and grandmother can't stand one another because she didn't think my mom should have married him but she mooches off of my father's success with every chance she gets. My parents were invited to the White House, she went too. Time magazine ran a cover article on my dad's company, she had to have her two cents. They got a new vacation home down in Miami, she insisted that they purchase her a guest home. I mean really grandma, you're 67 years old why do you need a house on the  beach in sexy Miami, Florida?

             My phone rang again. This time my father was calling from his office phone. "Come on, dad! Clearly I don't want to speak to you," I thought. Again I hit ignore.

            As I continued to walk I saw lights. Maybe I was getting out the dumps of this area. I came to a crosswalk at what seemed like a small business district still in an urban area. There was a candy store that caught my eye. It had a sign in the window that said "All CANDY 1 Penny!" When Roselyn and I were younger and would visit my dad's parents in Pasadena, California they had a store in their neighborhood that sold candy for one cent. I just had to go in there. Before  I did I promised myself that since I only had three hundred and twenty-three dollars and twenty-three cents, I would spend no more than three cents. That may even be too much with my life in shambles right now but eh, you only live once. 

         Inside I was greeted by an older gentleman who introduced himself as Mr. Getty. Seemed real nice. While I browsed I overheard him tell some kids, "go down to the youth center, it's spaghetti night." At the moment when he said spaghetti my stomach started to growl, boy was I hungry. I grabbed a pack of bubblegum, huge Symphony chocolate bar, and a water. There goes my three cents. I was thinking that it should tide me over til I got a real meal but I didn't foresee one anytime soon. 

        I went to the register to pay for my items and Mr. Getty's granddaughter Inez bagged the order. "That will be $1.02," she said sweetly. 

       I questioned, "$1.02?"

       "Yes, that's what I said."

       "But the sign says...."

      Mr. Getty overheard us and interjected. "Dear the sign says "all candy, 1 penny. Water is not candy."

      "I understand sir but you see I'm short on cash and today just hasn't been.."

      My phone was blowing up again. Five text messages and now three missed calls from my father because you know I hit ignore. I looked back at Mr. Getty and he told me, "dear we all have bad days but those bad days prepare us for our brighter ones. The days where we can rejoice that we had a bad a day." I sort of understood but I didn't. It was like he was speaking an ancient proverb or something. "Rejoice that you had a bad day?" Guess I would understand it whenever the brighter days showed up. 

     Mr. Getty asked, "Dear, you aren't from around here are you?" Him continuously calling me Dear was getting on my nerves so I told him my name and part of my story. As I opened my bag to pay Inez he told me that it was on the house. Inez saw my ballet shoes and that led us to talk about dance. For a change I was happy to discuss my formal training. Inez was only in high school but she expressed her dreams of one day attending Julliard and then being a part of a company where she could perform the classics like Swan Lake. I spent about 45 minutes in the store with Inez and Mr. Getty. I decided I should leave before it got too dark, but besides that I needed to figure out where I was really headed.

    Before I left Mr. Getty and Inez both told me I should go down to the Youth Center for spaghetti night. To my surprise it was FREE!  Where I come from you have to pay for everything, even thank you's. The Youth Center was only two blocks away on Main Street and Loving Lane. It was more than I expected. There was kids learning karate, a library/homework area, art studio, and best of all a dance studio with bars and kids who wanted to learn how to perfect their craft. I wonder why Inez didn't mention it was here. I did know one thing though I was in Heaven.

    Just a lady was approaching me, my phone started to vibrate again. This time the Caller ID said Myles. Myles was my parents assistant's son who lived with us. He was like a younger brother to me. We'd grown up in the same house. Shoot, I considered his mother Meghan to be my mother. She treated me as if I was hers. She was there from the time I my mother delivered me and the doctor spanked me on the butt to every pivotal moment and milestone I ever had. I pondered on whether or not to answer but I did. I just hope my dad wasn't using Myles as a pawn to get to me. He knew that kid was my weakness.

       "Hello."

       "Rae, where are you," Myles said. 

       "Myles, what's up my whereabouts are not important."

        "Yes, they are. Mr. Mack (his interrputation of their last name Mccullar) has been calling you all day."

        "Myles, I'm fine. Just after that argument with my mom, I had to leave."

        "Rae, forget all of that we have bigger issues than arguements to think about."

       "What do you mean?"

        "Your dad has been trying to reach you because it's an emergency....."

         "An emergency?"

         "Yes, an emergency. It's....it's....it's Roselyn........"

Spikes? (Fashion FWD Friday)

Ladies....Apparently spikes and studs are IN!

I don't know about you but everywhere I go I spiked everything.

And I want to know how you gals feel about it?

We rocking it? or Knocking it? 

Personally, I feel like its a great way to find the edge in you, the fierce in you, the rocker in you. 

You can mix it up with hard and soft, and dress it up or down according to your own personal style.

But, I also think its also easy for you to go overboard with it. 

Stay simple and choose distinct memorable pieces to make your outfit. It's not necessary to wear spike everything in one outfit. Choose wisely and you'll look and feel good!

                                      

     CELEBS HAVE EVEN BEEN SPOTTED ROCKIN' SPIKES...

 AND YOU KNOW I HAD TO SAVE MY JESSIE J FOR LAST :)

SO YAY OR NAY TO SPIKES & STUDS?

Stay (I)nspired, Misha J

Truth Is...."I Don't Care"

That's right! It is Truth is Thursday! 

Truth Is...I Don't Care! 

That's what singer/songwriter Elle Varner says in her song with the same title, 'I Don't Care'. When she says I don't care she is referring to what people think about her choice of love. Take a look the video and listen closely to the words.

Now, I'm still learning about not judging my peers and family for the choices they make with their hearts. It's not business even though all I want is the best for them. We should not judge anyone based off of who they love or why they love them. The truth is, love has them going off into the deep end and they don't care what anyone thinks or has to say. Elle I salute you for writing your experiences and sharing them with the world but more so for the visual intellect you gave us to understand the full meaning of your beautiful lyrics. 

I guess when you're in love you just don't care.....

Motivating from a far~Ari 

Happiness (Wisdom Wednesday)

I'll make this one short and simple because it is short and simple...

I used to always say...."I just wanna be happy" ...very similar to that leona lewis song called "happy."
Especially during this time in my life where I am not in the place where I imagined I'd be but that by no means should equate to being unhappy right?

And that's what I have to remember is that HAPPINESS is not an end goal. Happiness is a temporary emotion...A temporary state. There are plenty of events and incidents that you will encounter that will alter that state of happiness, but you have to know that it will return. Not exactly when you want it to or how you want it to, but it will return.

As much as I hate to tell you this, but happiness isn't constant. Its ever changing. But, I will tell you that it makes you appreciate those moments of happiness even more. You will cherish them, love them more, embrace them, because it will come and it will go. That's reality.

But to hold on to those bits of happiness during those rough patches in your life find simple things that you love from day to day to balance out the unhappiness feeling in your life. Whether its treating yourself to a dinner out, cooking your favorite food/dessert, or going on a mini shopping spree, whatever it is find those little things to bring that spark of happiness back into your life while you are on your journey to get where you want to be.

One last thing...

NEVER EVER EVER STOP FIGHTING FOR WHAT YOU WANT AND WHERE YOU WANT TO BE...

 FIGHTING IS CONTINUOUS.

With that being said...listen to leonas words a little bit closer this time...

Talent Tuesday

The Talent goes to.....

This weeks Talent Tuesday spotlights Ava Duvernay! You've probably been hearing the streets talk lately about this fly filmmaking sistah from Long Beach, California....Why? It is because she just made history as the first African-American woman to win Best Director at the 2012 Sundance film festival.  Not only does that factoid make Ava unique but she didn't start out as filmmaker. 

Yes she worked in the movie/television entertainment industry but it was in the focus of Public Relations. Duvernay decided that she wanted to learn about the film distribution and took the initiative to do and soon after delved herself into other facets of the industry where she begin writing and drawing up plans for AFFRM (African-American Film Festival Releasing Movement). She is the founder of AFFRM, a group of filmmakers, writers, and actors alike who want to see the depictions of people who look like them have their untold stories unfold on the silver screen. Be sure to check out Ava's Sundance award winning film in select theaters now 'Middle of Nowhere' (see preview below). 

Ms. Duvernay I'm sure this isn't the last we will hear of you making history. If I don't beat you to the punch, I am sure we will be hearing this: "And the Academy Award for Best Director goes to...... Ava Duvernay!"

Check out her website and other films like "I Will Follow"

 http://www.avaduvernay.com/

Motivating from a far ~Ari 

Motivational Monday

 Do you ever just go through life and feel as though its going too fast? That you don't get to do the things you WANT to do because you are spending all your time doing the things you HAVE to do?

Well today is the day that you need to change all of that. You have one life to live for all we know and there is no reason why you should not be spending your precious time on this earth living it how you want to.

I am definitely guilty of this, I can often be a worry wart and need to slow down and get back to the things in my life that I enjoy doing.

So! FIND A HOBBY! No matter what it is, whatever you love to do, find it and commit to doing that thing at least once a week. Even if you have to set aside a specific day and time for it. Just make sure you do it!

I used to play instruments in high school, and you just don't know how much I miss music and playing and a lot of my past hobbies that I often start yet never finish or continue to do on a regular basis...jewelery making, soap making, photographing artistically, art, design the list just goes on...smh...sad I know.

But guess what? Like I said it starts today. Find something and stick to it. You'll be a much happier person, and feel more accomplished in the midst of your busy life.

Remember to slow down, breathe a little, and live a little :)

What is the hobby you are going to commit to?

Stay (I)nspired, Misha J

One Wing-Part 1

          Three hundred and twenty three dollars and twenty three cents. Three hundred and twenty three dollars and twenty three cents. That is all I have to my name. How am I going to survive with three hundred and twenty three dollars and twenty three cents?

          That is what continues to play over and over in my head as I sit on this raggedy and extremely foul smelling bus. I don’t know where I’m going nor what I’m going to do when I get to where ever I’m going. Right now I have absolutely no solutions to any  of my problems. You would think that I have zero problems being that I am a recent Graduate of George Mason University with a major in dance, have so-called loving parents, with a large beautiful home in Virginia Beach, but no. My degree in dance means absolutely nothing in the real world, my father never believed in my choice to pursue dance and my mother? …Well she has no backbone and my oh-so-lovely home in Virginia Beach where I grew up is nothing but large and beautiful on the outside but stale and cold on the inside. That’s why I had to go, well and because of a huge argument I got into with my mom.

           I still cannot believe that she told me, “Man I feel so stupid for forgetting to take my birth control that day. Damn!” And she said it with so much passion in her voice and in her eyes. I knew when she said that, it didn’t just slip out her mouth, but something that has been burning inside of her for 23 years. I was done!...Completely done when those words touched my ears.

          It seems like I have been trying to please them all of my life and still find some way to keep myself happy. I know I’m young but I have learned that is impossible. I have given up on that, on them, and my whole family. All my parents do is compare me to my “amazing” sister who now lives in New York City working for Teen Vogue Magazine, with some important title. I don’t know how many times I have told them I am not Roselyn Marielle Mccullar, I am Rae Jora Mcculler. I am nothing like my sister and don’t want to be nothing like her or my parents for that matter.

          That argument was the turning point for me, so here I am on this bus in some blue jeans, tired sneakers, and a sky blue t-shirt. This is what my entire wardrobe consists of now plus two other t-shirts, one other pair of jeans, and my ballet slippers in my brown back pack. That was all I could grab and all that would fit in my bag in the few minutes I had to leave the house.

          I look up from my worn jeans and out of the window and I begin to imagine myself dancing on the sidewalk, on the benches, in the streets. Ballet, hip hop, ballroom, Latin, African, jazz, Bollywood, even belly dance, I love it all and can do it all.

          A light jazzy beat begins to play in my head and I close my eyes and drift off into my own concert with bright lights, a huge open stage, and an audience so engaged in my performance. Yes, now here comes my leap that ends the show…I get a running start and----.

          “Rae?” I heard someone say.

          I opened my eyes and a dark skinned girl about my age comes walking toward me in the back of the bus. I don’t know who this chick is and by no means am I in the mood of talking to anybody right now.

          “Rae? Is that you? How are ya?”

           I just looked at her, “uhh, yea. Hi”

           “What’s up girl? I haven’t seen you in years.”

           “Yea, it sure has been awhile. Wow!” I said as sarcastic as possible hoping she would get the point.

           “So, do you still dance?”

           Nope! She didn’t catch the hint.

           “Yea” I said hoping now this would end this pointless conversation.

           “You were such a great dancer. I bet you’re getting all types of high-paying gigs huh?”

           Alright I can’t take this not one second longer. The bus was slowing down. YES!

           “Welp, this is my stop. Nice talking to ya.” I replied as I quickly grabbed my things and headed to the door.

           “Uhh yea, nice talking to you too. Maybe I’ll see ya around.”

           “Shit, I hope not,” I mumbled as I stepped off of the bus.

           

          I just walked, and walked and walked. Ten minutes had passed before I realized that I was still walking. I stopped and took a look around. Shit where the hell am I? All I saw was abandoned buildings, grungy-looking people, and trash all over the streets. The sun was beginning to set and I had no idea where I was going to go, where I was going to sleep, what to eat, nothing. That girl totally messed me up. Not that I had any plans, but I know for damn sure I wouldn’t have got off at that stop. Shit!

Bzzzzzz. Bzzzzzzzzzz.

          I reached into my back pack, rustled through my things and finally found my vibrating phone all the way at the bottom.

          “Incoming Call…..Dad,” flashed on the screen.

Bzzzzzz. Bzzzzzzzzzz.

          I hit the ignore button, tossed my phone back into my bag, and kept on walking.